When I look back on the days before you came into my life I am amazed — I cannot believe how far I have come as an individual. We met at a time where I was desperately seeking stability in all aspects of life. My opinion of ‘boys’ was unfortunately carried over to men as well. When we first met I wasn’t interested in even the idea of having a relationship. I thought your game was sweet but that you were likely just another asshole. It was one of those rare but true circumstances where it was not you, it was me. I had been hurt one too many times. My thought process was that in order to be happy I had to work hard enough to be independent. I was simply tired of relying on others for my happiness.
Soon I realized I could not avoid your charm. You made me laugh so hard I would snort at work in my favorite red dress. When you would see me overwhelmed with reservations & struggling to hang a fur coat that weighed more then me you were right there helping me. I spent so much energy pretending I didn’t like you it would have been easier to just give in. You called me every night & we’d talk until our phones would die or our eyes were filled with sand. After 3 days of ignoring your calls (I was trying my hardest to not fall in love) I received a text on my way to school that said “Are you alive?”
It has been over a year since you sent me that text and to make things worse I don’t think I ever replied. So here it is my love. Better late then never: Yes, I am alive. I am SO alive! I woke up in the middle of the night from a bad dream last week & when I turned over you kissed me — it took my breathe away. My heartbeat is steady & healthy because of you. You help me to be the woman I have always wanted to be. You believe in my dreams & listen to all my stupid blog posts. You even tell me how proud you are when I get a new follower or kind comment. After working for hours you come home & still stay up late to watch our favorite show with me. You don’t get mad when I run into your heels with the grocery cart, and you tuck me into bed when I fall asleep on the couch. I fell in love with you when I was trying my very hardest not to and for that I thank you… That was the time that I needed you in my life the most.
Happy Birthday Andrew, I love you with every little piece of me.
You’re an incredible man & I am so proud to call you mine. Cheers to the times we have had & many more to come.